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the UNPOPULIST

The prayers of both could not be answered.theunpopulist@hotmail.com

5/07/2005
As of this post, the UNPOPULIST has taken up residence on TYPEPAD.

11/07/2004

Will our Theocrats stop at nothing?

Technical Buschwa HTML problems in certain posts have been killing blogger lately, and according to reports my site has been timing out and even freezing browsers.

I'm working on it. Certain award-winning peices may disappear for a time. You'll live, I can only assume.

This will all culminate, momentarily, in the UNPOPULIST migrating to a better service. I will continue to post dutifully until then.

Technical advice (encouragement, gainsaying, etc) is of course warmly welcome.

Enjoy the Sunday.

UPDATE: Offending post summarily expurgated. New home warming toward grand opening.
11/06/2004 Now It's All Coming Together The Left is finally reaching a consensus about who they'd rather fight than terrorists.

Christian extremists mostly talk amongst themselves, and it would help galvanize liberals to actually hear the way they talk more often.
Last night I wrote a post suggesting that there were some cultural conservatives we could reason with, and there were some we couldn't. This is an example of the latter. Our job isn't to compromise with these guys in any way, it's to persuade a majority of our fellow citizens to reject their brand of theocratic hatred. Publicizing their spittle flecked rantings is a good way to start.

Now, let me just...okay:

Nov. 2, 2004, is the Left's 9/11.

Fundamentalist Christian Leaders are bin Laden, Bush is the Taliban--"Theocrats" all.

And we, who on Nov. 2 bludgeoned the Nance and all the nances he is supposed to represent (23% of whom voted Bush, BTW) --WE are the Arab Street. That's why we're such idiots, see. Really, ours is a different stripe of terror, since we prosecute our mass-murders by way of due electoral process.

Sly, I know. It's sort of a straw-man for the twenty-first century.

Food for thought, though: It is really quite something what the Left can come up with when a Republican manages to keep blood-drinking fascists out of their hair for a healthy ammount of time.

And no matter how tempted any moonpie ever is to abandon the moon villiage, Drum and his ilk will be standing there ready, saying: "If you leave now, the (Bush) terrorists win."

UPDATE

Related:

CHIN UP.

We're smarter than those motherfuckers.
We can learn more quickly than those motherfuckers.
We can be more ruthless than those motherfuckers.
We can be some six-million-dollar motherfuckers ourselves.

Chin up.
We're more American than those motherfuckers.
We're more responsible than those motherfuckers.
We're more compassionate than those motherfuckers.
Hell, our atheists are more Christian than their Bible-thumpin' motherfuckers.

There's an election in two years.
There's nothing we can't do.

Chin up.
Because it's on, motherfuckers.
It is on.

Really applicable to "motherfuckers" off all walks of life, I think. It's sort of like The Battle Hymn of the Republic, if your the type who likes to scrape your forearms with broken glass and paint out Battle Hymn of the Republic lyrics on the walls of your bedroom.

(thanks Treacher)
11/05/2004 Name That Playboy

"I think it is, by and large, a mistake for our party to sit around and ... whine about this and that or the other thing"
...
"If we let people believe that our party doesn't believe in faith and family, doesn't believe in work and freedom, that's our fault"...
...
"The Republicans had a clear message, a good messenger, great organization and great strategy," he said. "The Republicans did a better job of turning out those who were already registered who hadn't voted" as well as bringing out their base, he said.
...
"I hope that we'll be able to diminish the culture war, not by getting people to give up what they think is right and wrong, but by getting them to listen to one another and look at one another as people again, and not as cartoons."
...
If Bush can broker a peace agreement, as Clinton did in 2000, fighting for Palestinian statehood would no longer motivate Islamic fundamentalist terrorists worldwide, he said.
...
"They would have to think of a new excuse to murder people," he said.

Hint: If he said enough stuff of this quality all the time, I would go down on him.

Unfortunate he doesn't.
Ad Mortem The Tragical Historie of Kerry '04

Fun.

But it occurs to me that I cannot respond to this article without repeating myself. So see below. What's Old Is New Again With the finality of the election percolating around opinion media right now, I am inspired to resurrect a very old award-winning article--the UNPOULIST's foruth ever post. Only now, post-mortem, can its transformative prescience be truly felt.

I give you:

John Kerry's Penis Head

I'll admit I've started thinking I might like John Kerry. Not like, but feel for, I think: like that moldering, never-was Oscar Wilde-type, who was smart, and capable of being funny, arguably, and was appreciated by intellectually unserious people, but was serious himself, never clearly tested his capabilities and so never confirmed their existence, whatever they were supposed to be for, remained rather morose and thoughtful indefinitely, never had a clue what he was really supposed to be doing with himself besides what HIS STATION MEANT, which of course he could never take seriously--that good-looking booksmart late-twenty something that no one pays attention to anymore, the unbloomed late-bloomer--that decade-ago carousing partner you just can't BRING YOURSELF to catch up with.

You know who I'm talking about. Hamlet, l'effete? Hamlet without the dumb play, the three brutal murders, the speeches. The Contemplator, superhero of precisely no superpowers. You know, the most tragic, least relevant person you can think of?

I'm starting to think, yeah, that's Kerry.

So Kerry looks at me and says, I just want a chance to finally figure out what I'm doing in public life. And I shake my head, because I just have to, and I say,

"Man,

I want nothing to do you."

Intellectual insecurity is understandable, in fact; it's perfectly natural or it's pandemic, one or the other, though it will be cured in none of our lifetimes. That insecurity, though, applied, is what we call inaction. And in that light John Kerry's abscence from John Kerry's career over the last quarter decade makes a lot of sense. So does John Kerry's abscence from any one John Kerry utterance.

The lude straddling--Kerry's gaggingly inept multipicity of postures--the burlesque is quite normal, I'm thinking, for somebody who has not gotten over the hump of deciding what to do when and if he grows up--isn't that is the most frequent and fundamental puzzlement of any well-off dandy?

So it's understandable. Indefinite puzzlement is understandable. What it's not is ELECTABLE. (What's the old saying? "John Kerry is Unelectable.") We all love Rodin, we all love "the Thinker," but we would swoon a little buyer's remorse, I'm guessing, if we elected the Thinker and when something large and beloved dissappeared from the face of the Earth we couldn't get the Thinker of his ass short a jackhammer. I think we miss Rodin a little if we don't recognize that all the thinker has done for the past 120 years is sit and stare. Is the sculptor not laughing at him just a little?

So I get John Kerry, I think, but I can't possibly accept that he's seriously asking me for the keys to the battleships. I know he just wants the gestalt, the snappy dialogue; he wants the sunsets.

John Kerry's penis head belongs to a very complicated woman, I'm told. I'm thinking it's affixed to something too complicated to be president.

I Have Arrived #1 on google for what word?

You guessed it.

UDPATE: All we are is dust in the wind.
AAaaaah! Okay, what I want is to stop talking about the elections for five minutes, but...JESUS CHRIST, did anynody catch this yesterday?

Shortly after Florida had been painted red for Mr. Bush, Fox News declared that Ohio--and, very likely, the presidency--was in Republican hands. Howard Wolfson, a [Kerry] strategist, burst into the "boiler room"...and said, "we have 30 seconds" to stop the other networks from following suit. The campaign's pollster, Mark Mellman, and the renowned organizer Michael Whouley quickly dialed ABC, CBS, CNN and NBC--and all but the last refrained from calling the race through the night.

They even got bonus oral sex treatment from Dan, who could shut the fuck up about it being the closest election in history (which it wasn't by half), and of course the magic provisional ballots waiting to pull it out for Kerry (which, of course, they couldn't).

(via the Corner)

And from Ratherbiased we get Rather turning on Dippity Dog #2 for daring to employ a calculator.

If %80 of the provisional ballots go Democrat, says Bradley, the democrats will make up only 140,000 votes, and that's still not enough.

"So what are you telling us?" Dan asks, daring Ed Bradley to "agree with Karl Rove."

"Based on these numbers," Ed says meekly, "after the provisional ballots have been counted, Bush will have won."

Dan, verbatim:

"We shall see."
Arafat and the Boys Reader/critic Patton points us here, a World Net round-up of the scant--though indeed scandalous--details of Yassar Arafat's "mysterious" illness.

Now I can't get naked Yassar off my mind. Thanks Patton.

Anyway, this is something that struck me since just before the election:

Bush and Sharon effectively have persuaded foreign leaders to disregard Arafat because of his direct involvement in terrorism and failure to make peace for his people. Many have agreed that a second Bush term would be the final nail in Arafat's political coffin.

No, that is not a deft metaphor of any kind, but what's actually happening is.

Bush's reelection represents and is the death of so much geriatric tyranny: Arafat, Castro, CARTER--history is punctuating their real and figurative longed-for demises with America's assured embrace of a different kind of leader. An American kind. Not only have we reembraced George Bush this November, I think we've reaffirmed our affinity for Ronald Reagan as well, the embodied refutation of all three of the old men dying this month.

It really is just such good news.

11/04/2004 Some Lefty Grace This statement I like:

It was not a landslide, or a re-alignment, or even a seismic shock. But it was decisive, and it is impossible to read President Bush’s re-election with larger Republican majorities in both houses of Congress as anything other than the clearest confirmation yet that this is a center-right country - divided yes, but with an undisputed majority united behind his leadership.

Is it a trend? Probably not, I guess.

All anybody all television can talk about is that "morality" emphasis among Bush voters. Hardly a herring worth deboning. Maybe later.

ALSO: If anybody can tell me where I found this quote, I would love to know. The article is from the Times, obviously, but I saw it excerpted somewhere, the window got closed at some point, and I haven't had enough sleep to decide whether leaving it up is blog-ethical.

Here's hoping.

Jeez, Osama has spent a lot of time in that cave.
RUN!! Blair notes a good omen:
Mr Moore has publicly called for Hillary Clinton to enter the 2008 presidential race, and is now expected to turn his attentions to supporting her.
MIKEY LOVE LITTLE WOMAN....

MIKEY PET...

MIKEY PET...

SQUISH, SQUISH, SQUISH, SQUISH...
Re: An Instant Classic Now that the election's over, I insist you go back and watch this again.

It's getting me all emotional today.
Arafat Is Dead Probably.

Hopefully.

UPDATE: Had anybody gotten wind of the Arafat AIDS rumor? Frum mentioned it last week and I'd forgotten about it.

Kos to Burn Self in Street, Stamp and Sing Over Own Flaming Self, Decorate Bridge With Self, 'Screw' Self Though Democratic sanity continues to simmer:

No, Kos, you ignorant tool. The problem isn't the message machine; it's that the core activists in the Democratic Party have managed to walk away from the values that most people in this country hold, and persist in looking at the electorate as if it's the one with the problems. The majority of people in this country don't want gays put in camps, they don't want a theocracy, they don't believe in 'shoot first, talk later'. And as long as you believe they do, you'll lose, and you'll take my party with you.

Fake story here. Real story here.

(Thanks Treacher)
11/03/2004 Gotterdammerung You know, yeah, the Democrat's fuddlement is amusing, it's reassuring, it's just. But eventually I'm gonna stop laughing about it, because eventually--as soon as possible, in fact--the Democratic Party needs to figure out how to start contributing to, you know, Republican Democracy.

Check out the atrophy (ripped from Aaron's Rantblog): Washington - 140,000 DOWN TO 120,000. 14% less blue.California - 1.3M DOWN TO 1M. MUCH less blue. 300,000 votes less blue.Hawaii - 68,000 DOWN TO 37,000. MUCH less blue. HALF as blue.Michigan - 220,000 DOWN TO 165,000. LESS blue, about 25%Delaware - 43,000 DOWN TO 27,000. 37% less blue.Maryland - 330,000 DOWN TO 280,000. Less blue. 15% less blue.Pennsylvania - 200,000 DOWN TO 122,000. 39% less blue.New Jersey - 500,000 DOWN TO 212,000. MUCH less blue. 288,000 votes less blue. 58% less blue.New York - 1.7M DOWN TO 1.2M. MUCH less blue. Half a million votes less blue. 29% less blue.Connecticutt - 255,000 DOWN TO 160,000. MUCH less blue. 37% less blue.Rhode Island - 119,000 DOWN TO 86,000. Less blue. 28% less blue. The Democrats gained big in Minnesota, Vermont, and the People's Republic of Oregon. ZERO Republican strongholds. Above, of course, you see major Bush swells all over both coasts.

Now, how much of this simply reflects the deep sympatico half the country seems to have with Bush, and how much reflects the spectrum of unelectable modifiers embodied by Senator Kerry? Well...I guess probably a big helping of both.

That's not the point. The point is this is who the Democrats nominated in a time of war. The point is this Democratic Party lacked the vision and almost completely the resources to make a better choice--for us and for its own fortunes.

One question posed by the Republican sweep yesterday is how long will it take for a moderate contingent within the Democratic Party to organize itself, and begin dismantling it's virulent one?

I say 8 years minimum. And I'm not rejoicing for that number, I think it sucks.
I Had a Harper's Subscription Then they found out my parents were married:

Should one candidate win, those who opposed the Iraq war might hope to find refuge in France, where a very select few are allowed to “assimilate” each year. Assimilation is reserved for persons of non-French descent who are able to prove that they are more French than American, having mastered the language as well as the philosophy of the French way of life. Each case is determined on its own merit, and decisions are made by the Ministère de l’Emploi, du Travail, et de la Cohésion Social. When your name is published in the Journal Officiel de la République Français, you are officially a citizen, and may thereafter heckle the United States with authentic Gallic zeal.

Mm, yes, hilarious.

It's "A reader’s guide to expatriating on November 3."

Harper's does provide a valuable service, I think, putting in a very small space everything you hate about the rich, educated, and supposedly well-meaning.
From goat-reactionary Politburo A Good Point About Exit Polling:

The networks used the exit polls more carefully than previously; the biggest impact was to hold some red states as too-close-to-call for an extra hour. Next time, they will be even more cautious. In other words, they will rely more and more on the accumulated raw vote. Sounds good to me. Also, the liberal commentators at the networks used the flawed exit poll data to put a pro-Kerry spin on the early numbers. Big deal. Would anything stop them? They would simply find something else to use. And now that the tool is so discredited, they'll have to more creative next time around anyway.

Similarly, before this election, I was really having trouble with all those prophecies of an arduous monthlong vote-disputing nightmare. Wait, I quizzled, this isn't just gonna be the most hotly contested election "in history" (which it wasn't) it's going to be the most closely monitored.

And, look Ma, no recount.
More of Kerry's Thing With Freud Kerry's Fonzyish "Can you believe 'dis?" post-failure message arrived today. It incuded this bit of oddness:

"Earlier today I spoke to President Bush, and offered him and Laura our congratulations on their victory."

Is this protocol, or does Kerry have husband-wife issues? Is he envisioning Bush in the inverse situation, going, "Earlier today I conceded victory to Senator Kerry and the estate of Senator Heinz" ? Or am I being an ass?

Your call.
This Year's Hot Chistmas Buy A collectable, of all things.

Going fast...

(thanks Instapundit)
Kos Breaks it Down Chastened by 48 hours of extreme drama and passion, Zuniga issues humble verdict:

Now we come at last to the heart of darkness. Now we know, from their own words, that the Bush Regime is a cult -- a cult whose god is Power, whose adherents believe that they alone control reality, that indeed they create the world anew with each act of their iron will. And the goal of this will -- undergirded by the cult's supreme virtues of war, fury and blind faith -- is likewise openly declared: "Empire"...

For Bush, as for Mao, "discernible reality" has no meaning: Political, cultural, economic, scientific truth -- even the fundamental processes of nature, even human nature itself -- must give way to the faith-statements of ideology, ruthlessly applied by unbending zealots.

This isn't politics as usual -- not even an extreme version of it, not McCarthyism revisited, Reaganism times two, or Nixon in a Stetson hat.

There's never been anything like it in American life before: a messianic cult backed by vast corporate power, a massive cadre of religious zealots, a highly disciplined party, an overwhelming media machine and the mammoth force of history's most powerful government -- all led by men who "create new realities" out of lies, blood, theft and torment.

Their "empire" -- their Death-Cult, their power-mania -- is an old madness rising again.

Jeez, I thought he'd just say something about togetherness.

UPDATE: Actual story--somewhat more mind-wrenching than the above--here.
Christ Almighty There's a bunch of stuff I'd like to be linking and discussing right now, but blogger is on fucking life support. Everything is taking for ever. Alot of requests are timing out.

What's the deal?
La Muerte de Zogby That Zogby is some closer, he is:

Arizona
Zogby had it +6% for Bush
Final +11% for Bush

Arkansas
Zogby had it +3% for Bush
Final +9% for Bush

Colorado
Zogby had it too close to call
Final +7% for Bush

Florida
Zogby had it +.1% for Kerry and trending Kerry
Final +5% for Bush

Iowa
Zogby had it +5% for Kerry
Final still TBD

Michigan
Zogby had it +6% for Kerry
Final Result +3% for Kerry

Minnesota
Zogby had it +6% for Kerry
Final Result +3% for Kerry

Missouri
Zogby had it +3% for Bush
Final Result +8% for Bush

Nevada
Zogby had it too close to call
Final +3% for Bush

New Hampshire
Zogby had it +5% for Kerry
Final Result +1% for Kerry

New Mexico
Zogby had it +3% for Kerry
Final - still TBD

North Carolina
Zogby had it +3% for Bush
Final +13% for Bush

Oregon
Zogby had it +10% for Kerry
Final Result +5% for Kerry

Ohio
Zogby had it +2% for Bush but trending Kerry
Final TBD

Pennsylvania
Zogby had it trending Kerry
Final Result +3% for Kerry

Tennessee
Zogby had it +4% for Bush
Final +14% for Bush

Virginia
Zogby had it slight edge for Bush
Final +8% for Bush

Washington
Zogby had it +10% for Kerry
Final Result +7% for Kerry

West Virginia
Zogby had it +4% for Bush
Final +14% for Bush

Wisconsin
Zogby had it +6% for Kerry
Final Result +1% for Kerry

This crap took at least a year off Kerry's life. Ridiculous.

Also: Make sure you scroll all the way down to Zogby's shameless "statement."

Apparently it was a "trend" without a "result" that had them so confused.

Sounds confusing.
Morning in America, etc The Corner has victory speech highlights. I tuned in a minute late , just caught the extended waving portion. Bush didn't get his 8 hours last night, and you can tell. That is so funny. And more than a little, as the wife always says, "cute."

Congratulations to the President of course. And congratulations to the United States for getting its shit together on an important night.

Now let's go flatten the Sunni Triangle. And get me a Mullah on the phone.
Hats Off For the graciousness of his concession, Kerry gets a heavy ammount of credit. No slavering Joe Lockhart last night, either. He was civil, and humble, even before Ohio was certain. Somehow, last night, the fever lifted--and if the finality of the election has somehow restored Joseph Lockhart to decency, that bodes well.

Good for him and good for Kerry and good for us, as if it needs saying, that they steered away from coup.

Were they ever serious about it? Just how crazy did they go in this fight?

Later I hope to have a response from ring-master Terry McAuliffe. I don't want to call sanity to soon.
Kerry to File Suit Against Exit Polls of America For pain and suffering. And nothing else.
Bush is the President But not by enough yet.

Must nab New Mexico and Wisconsin. Hawaii and Minnesota are lost.

52-48 popular win is good.

Let's put it away.
11/02/2004 Done Done.
All Part of Rove's Moore/Kitty Kelly Plan From Steyn's real-time coverage (no permalink available):

Getting some e-mail to the effect that those "exit polls" predicting 59-41 for Kerry in NH, etc, were a cunning Karl Rove move to sucker the Dems into standing down their legal teams.

Pursuant to this:

Mulling it over, I'm coming to the conclusion that those afternoon "exit polls" reported by Wonkette, a specialist in penis jokes, and Drudge, who should know better, and even some of the later ones look like intentional deception. I'm told the reason the networks didn't call Virginia and the Carolinas is because the exit polls showed Kerry winning them - which is ridiculous but did its job of demoralizing some Republicans. The GOP should know by now that, for their candidates, it's real numbers that count. The "exit polls" is just some artfully layed Dem-media-pollster spin.

Nice to have Steyn with more than his little toe in the blogosphere this evening.

Might as well drop him a line and tell him so.
Vote or Thong Malkin with incredible unhippness: "Looks like Diddy will be eating bling-bling pie tonight." Cute, though. The title of the post is funnier.

But this is what you want.

NOTE: So far, nobody's reading the UNPOPULIST tonight. Believe me I understand that better than anybody.

So what I'm doing is spectating. Mostly watching Fox's 2, count 'em, election night broadcasts.

I will return to share in right-leaning triumphalism when the time comes.

Think big. Drink up.
Big Chests Florida, Ohio, West Virginia, Uzbekistan, Lesser/Greater Antilles?

ALL BUSH.

Hmm.

(via Ace-o-Spades)
Moore Makes Final Push to Isolate Moderates 'Lil Mikey's Message For the President:

I know it’s gotta be rough for you right now. Hey, we’ve all been there. “You’re fired” are two horrible words when put together in that order. Bin Laden surfacing this weekend to remind the American people of your total and complete failure to capture him was a cruel trick or treat. But there he was. 3,000 people were killed and he’s laughing in your face. Why did you stop our Special Forces from going after him? Why did you forget about bin Laden on the DAY AFTER 9/11 and tell your terrorism czar to concentrate on Iraq instead?

There he was, OBL, all tan and rested and on videotape (hey, did you get the feeling that he had a bootleg of my movie? Are there DVD players in those caves in Afghanistan?)

...Sure, I know what your pollsters told you, that the film had convinced some people to vote you out. I just want you to know that that was not my original intent. Funny things happen at the movies. Hope you get to see a few at the multiplex in Waco. It’s a great way to relax.

If Michael Moore isn't a Rove plant, then he is dispositive evidence of The Hand Of God.

And God's thing about irony...

(via Beldar)
UNPOPULIST: Late Breaking Trivia Via commentor Dylan, over on at Tim Blair:

Bush Takes Guam IN LANDSLIDE:

PRESIDENTIAL RACE
• George W. Bush 17,264
• John Kerry 9,540
• Ralph Nader 153
• Campagna Badnarik 53

The UNPOPULIST's crack wire analysis makes that BUSH 64% KERRY 35%

Guam is the freakin' ballgame, baby.

Six Degrees of GOP Insider From a Crush Kerry contact, re: stop panicking.

“Too close to call everywhere it matters,” he told me. “But one thing is certain. The Democrats’ hype regarding voter turnout was a double-edged sword. It infuriated our people and Republicans are voting in huge numbers.”

UPDATE:

Hewitt: "Exit polls are to election nights what food poisoning are to great restaurants."

More good stuff there.

Question: If the initial horrifying numbers were in large part Kerry numbers, just how much was that poison-pill tactic directed specifically at blogs.

And how fucking hard did we swallow?

UPDATE: BTW, Mark Steyn has showed up on the Corner a few times, each time to castigate the exit poll bunnies.
The Gip

Fucking Awesome.

Definitely worth a viewing.

Thanks Crush Kerry. Go here for large version.
Way to Go TEAM Guest blogger at Rottweiler helpfully suggests Kerry be lynched.

Deft.

(thanks Commissar)
2nd District Is Bush gonna shave one off in Maine?

Crap, that's gonna ruin my prediction.

UPDATE:

More exit poll fun:

A guy at my office works the phones for the Kerry Northwest campaign (Washington, Oregon, etc.).

Their people are freaking out over exit polls indicating Kerry tied or losing in Oregon.

Plenty of pressure for everyone.

GAZILLIONS DISENFRANCHISED Or: "Exit Polls Prejudiced Against Voters of All Races."

Copious early voting. Outrageuos abstentee counts.

2 pm: Tension at "Bearable Stage" The Corner has all kinds of panicking conservatives, right now, along with some trembly optimists.

Exit poll craziness nicely summarized by these numbers.

Hugh plays therapist to all: and praises the Daschle freakout.

Wizbang has your updates, including a developing fraud possibility in Phillie. Hopefully not major.

May be time to get the paper bag out.

Update: Live blogging from goat-reactionary Commisar.

And a bit of perspective from Jeff:

[Lief] Garrett: “In 1984, instead of voting, C. Thomas Howell, Emilio Estevez, and I spent the afternoon shrooming and licking Hershey’s syrup smiley faces off the thighs of some underage chicks we’d picked up at a Whitesnake concert.
“And for what it’s worth, not much good has happened since then.”

Update: Well, if they're happy, I'm happy.

Also: Some more pure class from Colonel Candlestick this morning, in case you missed.

"When I turned my boat in Vietnam into an ambush," he said, "I didn't see George Bush or Dick Cheney at my side."

Think about this: if Kerry is our president tomorrow he has a whole other problem. How do you lead if your campaign was explicitly a "referendum" on the other guy and nothing else?

UPDATE: Scary numbers probably bad?

UPDATE: Scary numbers probably bad.

UPDATE: Malkin and LGF back up. And they really need the f-ing traffic, so...

Here's why. (Mostly the picture.)
A Bit of Steyn Before Bed Read it and hold your breath:

Well, it's the big day, when Campaign 2004 moves from its electoral round into the litigation round.

God bless us every one, tomorrow.

See you then.
Jesus I'm Inconsistent Sorry about the meltdown today. Will be up and running in some capacity for the election.

In lieu of the UNPOPULIST 2004 Election Challenge, I will be sending 25 cents to whoever can tell what number and Spice Girl I'm thinking of.

11/01/2004 the UNPOPULIST 2004 Electoral Challenge On permanent hiatus for re-tooling. 10/31/2004

45 - 35 !?

!!

??

Who's Winning How Much
-link-

Can anyone, anyone at all, tell me how these numbers seem to trending as they get closer and closer to 2 Nov?

(UPDATE: The CNN/GALLUP/USA Today numbers sprung up since I posed this question.)

Anyone think this is a tie?

Cause I'm open to that.

UPDATE: Is he winning by three, or what?

UPDATE: Is it...three?
Incomplete Sunday News Missing minutes in Bin Laden video apparently tell a slightly different tale. He's frustrated. He's making pointed threats. And he takes Bush's pursuit of him personally. Good. (thanks Volokh, via Ace)

ZERO movement on this story right now.

At the Corner, Jim Robbins wonders if it's a new tape at all.

Little Chris Heniz calls Bush a "cokehead," and refuses to back off. Then takes up Buchanan's rhetorical light touch, blasting the "Israel lobby," for maintaining a the Holy Land as a kind of "51st state."

Reminded how well this slur is going to play in Miami-Dade, Chris detonates himself in a crowded square.

For now, this story is under MSM boycott as well. (Thanks Ace again)

Too bad, because American Arabs and Jews carry just the hugest torch for the Anti-Zionist Party. (thanks Protein)

Subtle elements within the Kerry campaigning are polling on bin Laden's appearance:

I'm going to read you a paraphrasement about the release of Bin Laden's videotape, please tell me what comes closer to your view: One, it makes me think that George W. Bush took his eye of the ball in Afghanistan and diverted his resources to Iraq; Two, it underscores the importance of George Bush's approach to terrorism.

By ten points, 46-36 percent, voters responding to the survey agreed with the first statement , rather than the second. "

Similar to previous Democratic R">

(see Drudge)

Troubling news, as early voting in Florida seems to over-represent the illiterate:

"Everybody says if you vote early you've got more chance."

"The other time I vote, my vote maybe goes in the garbage," said Derosier, who lives in Miami. "Now, I'm satisfied."

(Drudge again)

The Associated Press, perennial Angloid meddlers without a functioning republic of their own to sabatoge, continue to reprint the "missing weapons"chestnut.

Just as the UNPOPULIST, who does his reporting while consuming Pop Tarts, helped put the story to bed nearly a week ago.

Too bad about that Internet, gov'erner.

Patton notes Iraqis rising from the dead en masse.

I knew he had special powers.

Kerry grinning like a buy-here-pay-here auto salesman, and "tossing the hogskin" like the balletic nance he is, here.

Me yipping like a school girl about fresh polling here, and, to a lesser extent, here.

Love note to the ages below.

UPDATE:

Enough of that big font-little font crap.

Powerline has the Kerry team criticizing Bush as Major League Baseball owner. That by way of trying to insulate themselves from Curt Schilling's Bush endorsement.

Are they kidding? Have they ever been kidding before?

No, they're A joke, that's different.

(via Marcland)

UPDATE: Oh, and just in case you thought all blogs were so much sensationalist folly, try sticking this up your psyche for a few minutes. You'll be screaming for political trivia and bad satire in no time.
Top Ten Signs You Will Never Reach the Coveted 11th Tier of Blogosphere Influence 10. You add somebody to the blogroll, and they are immediately shut down and imprisoned under the "Superflous Article" of the Patriot Act.

9. You venture a technical question you think sounds reasonable and the blogger-recipient promptly turns Mennonite.

8. You promote your blog on Live-Sex-Forum and in the Amish Weekly, Wagons Ho.

7. You email Glenn a cute post, he sends back a subpoena.

6. You pimp your blog on college radio and accredidation gets pulled. And the cheerleading squad burns to the ground.

5. You go on Ace-o-Spades' tax-return as a dependent/deductible charity case/casualty and theft loss.

4. You send a cute post to your dad, he files for divorce.

3. 60% percent of your material is cut-and-pasted from somewhere else. 40% of your mail is hatemail.

2. Your schtick keeps giving out in favor of endtime prophecies and Gilmore Girls wrap-arounds. At which point traffic quadruples.

And the number 1 Sign That You Will Never Gain the Coveted 11th Tier of Blogosphere Influence:

You're happy where you're at.

Thanks for hanging out.

WTF: Why does the last one always have to be the Kodak still? Mercy

-link-

(Via Insty)

Look at the whole thing.

Seriously, is anyone really still not convinced? I don't buy it.

Ready for His Close-up As Always Michele Malkin notes Michael Moore's plan to have "1,200 professional and nonprofessional cameramen, filmmakers and videographers...bring their cameras to polling places in Ohio and Florida to prevent 'intimidation."'

A sort of Stalinist Counter-Intimidation squad, a Commisariat "for peace."

Fortunately "professional" and "non-proefessional," in this case, means "unemployed," and "unemployable." Not half of these tubs-o-guts are going to show.

In even better news, it isn't going to be close.
10/30/2004 Good News, Good News, Good News From Mason Dixon. (via the Corner)

Points of Sizzle:

Kerry's favorables are upside down in Arkansas, Colorado, Iowa, Missouri (yay!), Nevada, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, and New Mexico. (In Pennsylvania it's close, but, in Pennsylvania, it needs to not be close.)

And in Ohio apparrently 41% of registered voters have no opinion of Kerry at all.

Wow.

Bush's favorables are right-side-up in every Battlegroud.

As to the horserace, Bush is pushing the margin of error in Florida and Iowa, and he's above it in Arkansas, Colorado, Nevada, and West Virginia.

Outside Oregon, nowhere does Kerry lead by more than 2 points.

Except in crazy Oregon, for that matter, Bush is right-side-up on Job Approval as well.

My God the American people have fucking balls.

And that's what I've been on about: over the next 3 days I expect America to sack up.

And if that happens...

...I just don't expect a contest.

UPDATE: BTW, just try and put lipstick on GW.
Oops, They Ruined the Suspense Kerry, I'm sure, is thankful.

Labor Department staff, analyzing statistics from private economists, report in an internal memo that President Bush is likely to do "much better" in Tuesday's election than the polls are predicting...

The Labor Department report, obtained by The Associated Press, includes an analysis of economic models that suggest Bush will beat Democrat John Kerry. Titled "In Focus: Predicting the Election Outcome," the memo says, "Nearly every single model has him winning."

"Some show the margin of victory being smaller than the models' inherent margin of error, while others report the lead as substantial. And this is without the consideration of a third-party candidate..."

The Bush administration blamed midlevel employees for preparing inappropriate government material.

That vigilante accounting, it'll getcha' in hot water, it will.

Meanwhile: Kerry admits missappropriating campaign resources for stick and hobo-sack.

(via Drudge)
Technical Issues And no technical abilities.

Just a moment. Eh, who cares what the stupid Iraqis think.

As far as Iraqi elites are concerned, President Bush brought democracy to a land that knew only dictatorship. From Sen. Kerry, however, they hear no commitment to build a liberal state or, for that matter, any state. What they hear instead is a presidential aspirant who complains about "opening firehouses in Baghdad and closing them down in the United States of America," even as his campaign aides dismiss Iraq's prime minister as an American "puppet."
Not surprisingly, surveys by the Iraqi Center for Research and Strategic Studies find that, whereas Mr. Bush garners the most support in the Kurdish north and from Iraq's well-educated urban elites, Mr. Kerry draws his strongest support from what the Center's Sadoun al-Dulame calls Iraq's "hottest places"--hotbeds of resistance to the U.S. A poll taken earlier this month in Baghdad, for example, finds that while President Bush would win a higher tally in New Baghdad's Christian precincts, Sen. Kerry carries Sadr City hands down.

Good golly the Bad Guys like Senator Kerry a lot. Maybe that's what "global legitimacy" means.

Wait, that's exactly what "global legitimacy" means.

UPDATE: To clarify, the "Iraqi Center for Research and Stragic Studies" is that group who was giving us those post-Saddam happiness ratings a few months ago.

And, in case you passed over it, the slice of survey numbers being examined above reflect the feelings of so-called "liberal," or "elite" Iraqis: the literate ones who like freedom--that's all. The original article is addressed to them specifically, not to goat-cart Iraqis; or for that matter Saddam's cousins; or their goat live-ins.

That's kind of the point.

UPDATE: In a true shocker, l'Agence France-Presse focusses on "indifferent" Iraqis, and pines for halcyon days of Saddamite "security."

That's it, we're giving them the Nazis back.

Oh, wait...

UPDATE: Via RightThoughts, a real Iraqi to make the point much better than I can.

Then consider your real friends and allies, those who have stood with you and shed blood with you, and are willing to die for the common cause, whom do they want? Do you have any doubt about their preference?
....
Give the enemy the slap in the face and the great disappointment he deserves. You are the leaders; and all the lovers of freedom and enlightenment everywhere will take heart and charge with you with redoubled zeal, as they see your courage and defiance at the helm.

Go for it America, your friends are holding their breath and waiting, in anticipation, and yes, with anxiousness, and so are your enemies.

Almost makes me wish I were important enough for Oliver Willis to stop by and accuse the speaker of being an agent of the Rove-Goebbels.

One day.

ON THAT NOTE: Fresh comic genius above.
Saturday Reads

-Brooks has a very good one up:

Here was this monster who killed 3,000 of our fellows showing up on our TV screens, trying to insert himself into our election, trying to lecture us on who is lying and who is telling the truth. Here was this villain traipsing through his own propaganda spiel with copycat Michael Moore rhetoric about George Bush in the schoolroom, and Jeb Bush and the 2000 Florida election.

Here was this deranged killer spreading absurd theories about the American monarchy and threatening to murder more of us unless we do what he says.

One felt all the old emotions. Who does he think he is, and who does he think we are?

And there's more to it. Bush's statesmanship, Kerry's crassness, and so on.

(via Hewitt)

-Kristol notes something Steyn first called my attention to: Kerry's lack of discipline.

Ann Coutler's has a new column up I excerpted earlier: "40 Excuses and a Mule." It's funny and incisive, and not too crazy for those of you who tend to think of Ann as "too crazy."

-Jonah has some fun with Nuancer here.

Viz:

Sometimes he speaks in a unique Kerry grammar one could call the future-past perfect. When asked if we were right to invade Iraq, he has responded that it depends on what happens in the future...

But my favorite response was when he was asked if we'd have gone to war with Iraq if he'd been president, and he shot back confidently, "You bet we might have."

-Here's a rather more technical peice by Michael Barone about the possiblity of an electoral tie: in which case the new House selects a president and the new Senate seperately selects a VP (!!). He doesn't see it, at this point.

-And, finally, George Will points out the many ways we've won, even if we lose this Tuesday.

Why is this country so resistant to distributional neuroses?

Americans are aspirational, not envious.

Also, as far as the Bin Laden video's reception goes, I think we will see that American's are aspirational rather than survivalist.

Good sabbath.
AAAAAaaaaaahh! Say, Unkie Walter, how'd you like Osama's latest speech?

There is almost, in the fact that he dressed well, that he looked well, he was clean shaven, nearly clean shaven as those folks get. It seemed almost, to me, that he wanted to enter into negotiations, that he was really up -- he wants to move into a leadership role in international affairs instead of the role of a brigand.

Wait, is it too late to change my question? Um, could you drop dead already, Uncle Walter?

And he spoke calmly about this thing. The threat was there, no question about it. He's delivering a warning to us, no question about that. And certainly, I don't think there's any reason to feel that we can take him to our bosom just because this speech at all. He's perfectly capable of blowing us up.

Setting aside his geriatricity and all-consuming billiousness (the same that makes Rather such a firebrand), what the old man is fumbling around here trying not to say is that he thinks Bin Laden is a statesman.

Afganistan isn't Vietnam, mind you, but neither was Vietnam until Walter Cronkite took his microphone and his camera crew and went VC.

But wait, cause later that same meltdown:

I have a feeling that it could tilt the election a bit. In fact, I'm a little inclined to think that Karl Rove, the political manager at the White House, who is a very clever man, he probably set up bin Laden to this thing. The advantage to the Republican side is to get rid of, as a principal subject of the campaigns right now, get rid of the whole problem of the al Qaqaa explosive dump.

Where's his walker, Larry? Get him outta there!!

I believe that we're undoubtedly not going to know the results of this election. I don't want to knock you off the air on Monday night or anything, or Tuesday night. But I suspect that we're not going to know who the next president is, whether it is Bush or the new man, until very probably sometime in the early spring. There's so much controversy that they're planting, deliberately planting at the polls, that there's almost certainly to be a suit going back to the Supreme Court eventually, going through the other courts slowly first.

'Preciate it Walter. Now back to you dropping dead...

(thanks Insty)

UPDATE: Tim unearths the offending collaboration.
Keeping Kerry "In the Hunt," etc Ace has the latest ABC numbers, and apparently if the election falls "Within the Margin," Peter Jennings has been deputized to declare martial law and begin organizing a junta.

On the other hand, up-for-grab votes have swung hugely to the Bush-leaning side:

Movables in today's results favor Bush by 52-33 percent, a change from 46-36 percent in Kerry's favor as of Sunday. It's a small group — eight percent of likely voters, down from 14 percent when tracking began — but in a close race, an important one.

And just when I was going back through to flesh out some methodology issues I had, I come across this incredible paragraph:

The race has been quite stable among voters who say they've definitely made up their minds (essentially an even split between Bush and Kerry). There's been more change among movable voters — those who haven't made a definite choice.

A pair of ontological statements addressed to the ages: the decision of people who've "made up their minds" is a bit more "stable," WHEREAS there tends to be more fluctuating among people whose vote is in flux.

Shocking, I know.

My question is, how many of these "movables" are new likelies? I'll admit having faith--for me the Bush Break is not if but when. It's not an irrational faith, though. I'm just waiting for the numbers to match what I intuit about the actual electoral landscape, still sight-unseen right now. I suspect, for one, that Americans know better than to vote their way into another vexatious near-tie. I guess, plainly speaking, I expect Americans on Tuesday not to do something stupid.

Are previously unpolled segments breaking right now? When Bush and Kerry's position among movables (remember, that's people whose votes are "movable") simply swaps, as above, I have to wonder if the terrain is moving under the pollster's feet; numbers that draw more attention to their own incongruity and provenance, than corroborate other variable facts bespeak methodology, right? So you have to re-frame the poll yourself: for instance, I insist the above isn't about "movables" changing their minds and trending to Bush, it's about old movables becoming immovable, and all the new movables rallying to the president.

I haven't seen a poll that reflects the trend that I expect explicitly; and it may be that the rally I envision only takes shape Monday, in the form of momentum, and Tuesday in the form of people voting to preserve and extend the republic.

That poll I'll buy.

UPDATE: More good poll stuff on Ace:

Let them coccoon.

The coccoon gets ripped open on Tuesday.

Wow Sad.

Got somebody that doesn't know well enough to back the Terror War?

Show them this. And maybe remind them of that Jihadi bus driver we caught in Minneapolis.

And, if you have time, insist they beg forgiveness from God and country.

(via Hugh)
Truth Time #2 Let's be honest: this blog has long supported idiot-genius rapper Eminem.

-sigh-

"Bush is definitely not my homie," Eminem said in an interview to be published in Rolling Stone magazine's Nov. 5 edition, parts of which were posted Thursday on the magazine's website. "But I'm still undecided. Kerry has been known to say some things that's caught my attention, made a few statements I've liked but I don't know."

"Whatever my decision, I would like to see Bush out of office."

Now, that statement is so assinine (the first 6 words especially) that we could hope Em was fooling, that one of his hilarious alter-egos (hopefully the hoe-strangler) was simply taking point.

Unfortunately, Em has a new video along the same lines, viewable here. And, suffice it to say, the caucazoid left is rock-fucking-hard about it.

Well, I guess the UNPOPULIST's response is: Eminem is crazy. Eminem really is three or four different people. Eminem is quite something as a humorist and a Dr. Seuss-type, but people talented as Em can be safely expected to peform psychological acrobatics that sane people should just probably not pay much attention to.

And that is the UNPOPULIST's held position, I guess: Marshall who?

Here's hoping he changes one of his minds.
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