charlaanne

Web Name: charlaanne

WebSite: http://charlaanne.typepad.com

ID:21992

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charlaanne,

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He made my childhood magical. He played board games with me and my sisters, brought us fishing, planned fun family vacations, took us out to eat every Friday night, and was never too busy for us. He loved talking to me about boys and told me what to look for in a future husband. He showed me what a good marriage looked like by the way he treated my mom. What a gift he is to our family. Today and everyday I want to honor him. He is so loved. I don’t know how I survived 374 days without feeling his arms around me, hearing his laugh, kissing his handsome face, holding his hand, playing our favorite games, eating dinner together, playing with his soft hair, receiving the world’s best foot massages, getting his text messages throughout the day, looking forward to him coming home from work, his love notes, being able to pick up the phone to call him, doing his laundry, having someone that cared about every detail of my life. There is not a single thing about him I don’t miss. He was my world. I loved being his girl. I feel like I have been in survival mode the last 365 days. Just doing my best to show up. In the beginning the pain was so intense I felt like I could barely breathe. I’ll never forget the first day I felt a moment of joy. It gave me hope for the future because I realized I would have more and more moments like that as time went on. Several months later, I had a whole day free from the weight of sorrow. It was so unexpected and I thanked God for it. I’ve learned to look forward to those joy filled moments and better days. There is a hole in my heart and I long to be with Galin, but I will continue moving forward until my purpose on earth is complete. The pain of losing him keeps washing over me, taking my breath away. Since he died there have been many days I have felt completely lost and alone but looking back I can see God’s hand so clearly. I know He has never left my side. He has proven over and over again that He loves and cares for me. He has remained faithful even when I was faithless. I don’t deserve such love and grace but He bestows it upon me anyway. That is just the kind of Father He is. Brittany was at home that night and the rest of us were out of town. Thankfully she decided to go to her uncle’s house before the tornado hit.I woke up this morning thanking God I can spend this day with her.She is one of my best friends, someone I can confide in, my favorite walking partner, my frequent coffee date, and someone I can always count on for good meal ideas. I sure am grateful for this amazing daughter of mine! She is one of life’s sweetest gifts. The night the tornado hit, Galin said he wanted to celebrate April 30th for the rest of our lives. He wanted it to be a time of thanksgiving for our family. Tonight we will do just that because God is good all the time.

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