an honest journey through
the grit and glory of life

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words
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through my lens

The past few weeks have been a blur. An unanticipated surgery led to an antibiotic-resistant infection that bulldozed me in every way. As I came out of the fog of illness and sedatives, a new fog settled in. One of disappointment and frustration and anxiety and heartsoreness. This was not how my year was supposed to end. This was not how my life was supposed to look.-And yet... In the stillness, I also feel overwhelming gratitude to have come out the other side. I am thankful for those who showed up in much-needed physical, practical, and heart-strengthening ways. I am thankful for all the good — the unbelievable amounts of good — in my life.-So while I start this new year — this new decade — with more fatigue and less strength than I would like, I’m choosing to focus on what I have and who I am more than what I lack and who I’m not {yet}. Discontent comes more naturally to me than thankfulness does, so I’m going to more intentionally lean into gratitude in the year ahead.-Okay, 2020. Ready or not, here you are. I see you with all your still-unknown mountains and valleys. And I raise you, with gratitude.— — — — —Do you have a word you’re choosing to focus on in 2020? I’d love to hear how your #OneWord365 found you. 2019 didn’t go as I’d planned or hoped. I’m fairly certain I feel that way about every year though, so I suppose that says more about me than about the previous 365 days.EMBRACE. That was my challenge and my gift this year. Looking back, I see ways that I embraced the pain and the joy, the impossible hardships and the beautiful victories, the moments I’d craved as well as those I wish I could have avoided. I embraced the grief of what isn’t while also embracing the beauty of what is. I embraced the seven-layer-dip of my emotions as I continue to learn to face, feel, and release each one as it comes.EMBRACE. As always, I haven’t arrived at a finish line but I developed some “muscle memory” and will be taking this word — this focus — with me even as a new year begins.And tonight, as we close the chapter on this year and this decade, I will shut my eyes tight, let out a deep sigh, and give myself permission to start fresh. a r t • i s • e v e r y w h e r e.......#forbecks #artiseverywhere #nashville #nashvilletn #nashvillemurals #visitnashville #visitmusiccity “Shady Pines, Ma!”.......#thegoldengirls #goldengirls #shadypinesma #shadypines #christmasinnashville #nashvillechristmas #nashville It was two lifetimes ago that we first met — teenagers on the dusty soil of Botswana. Fast forward to our recent Big Sur adventure, where we were both struck by the uncanny similarities to that very first trip — in the rugged terrain, remoteness, and wonder — though with a significant “leveling up”!-Who says a once-in-a-lifetime experience really needs to happen only once in a lifetime? Let’s start planning our next adventure, Magpie! “There is a life to be livedright here in the waiting.”-@morganharpernicholsMy #OneWord365 journey with the word #embrace has been a challenging one. Like a rock in my shoe, it‘s remained an ever-present discomfort — one I wish at times I could shake myself free from. But there it remains. Pestering me to find contentment in my discontent. Gently reminding me there is much good in my now, even when my now doesn’t match the one I’d envisioned for myself. Whispering to me, “Don’t forget to breathe.” Inspiring me to lean into finding and strengthening the healthiest version of myself.Embrace. It’s led me to quiet resolve, to inner strength, to vulnerable release, to much-needed solitude, to joy and heartache and everything in between. It’s led me to simply feel. To simply be. To simply hold space for my own self.And once again I am reminded that regardless of the distance between now and not-yet, “there is a life to be lived right here in the waiting.” And I shake my head at the gentle annoyance of that rock in my shoe. Oh, Embrace... You’re not quite done with me yet... // neighborhood finds // c h a s i n g s u n s e t s November looks good on you, Nashville. All day, e’ry day. I’d never before been to the central coast of California and I have to say... it was love at first sight. Big Sur — in all your rugged, remote, no-cell-signal beauty — I’ll be back for you. // u n f o r g e t t a b l e //-#oitf #tabletofarm // b r e a t h t a k i n g // // o v e r w h e l m e d //-There are insufficient words for the experience of enjoying a meal at the top of a mountain overlooking the Pacific Ocean. It was pure magic. And this ‘words girl’ can’t find adequate syllables. o c t o b e r and just like that she decided to show up not because she knew she was ready but because she knew she would never be that thing with feathers Hello, Monday. I wish you could smell these. My intention this year is to embrace more. Embrace my life. Myself. My decisions,passions, needs. The moment. The one who's right in front of me. My feelings (including the light ones). My hopes (as well as my fears)..So I’ve been thinking a lot about what it really means to embrace these things. And—as I’ve realized is a bit of a pattern with me—I’m mostly thinking about what it *doesn’t mean*..‘Embrace’ is not always synonymous with ‘accept’. Sometimes it means making room for something else. Releasing. Letting go..Embracing that which makes me discontent is to acknowledge it. Look it in the eye. Call it by name. Wrestle with it. And determine which needs to change: its presence or my perspective on it..My aim is to find more contentment in my discontent. To embrace even that which is uncomfortable. And to more honestly and courageously call things by their actual name.___________________________#Embrace #OneWord365